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Sophie, as per the rules established after the 'letters from the outside' episode, you are now banned from the rest of the recap. I usually just put a whole carton in the microwave and hide under me bed.' We'd feel bad for them if it wasn't so hilariousThrilled to have his ride-or-die Sophie back, Chad whisked her away to the bedroom at the first chance he could. Seconds later, a fireball... then our vast windows flew across the room like...'Lebanon was a heaven, they made it hell': Anger mounts in Beirut as activists vow anti-government protests...Beirut counts the human cost: 300,000 people are left homeless with 50% of buildings damaged as death toll...Google and YouTube to BLOCK junk food adverts for under-18s in the UK amid government efforts to tackle...Chinese-owned TikTok announces plans to build data centre in Ireland after reports it wants a London HQ amid...Child, four, died after being trapped between two stair-gates in 'squalid' house of horrors where '45 bags...Mother shares photo of 'stretch mark' on her cleavage that turned out to be breast cancer to raise awareness...'The President was stating a fact': White House press secretary attacks Facebook and Twitter for 'flagrant...Donald Trump claims he made Boris Johnson shift his stance on Huawei's 5G access during a 'big and tough...Donald Trump says he is 'not involved' in efforts to get Kanye West on the ballot in presidential swing...Italian billionaire whose £30m  superyacht sank after it fell off the back of a cargo freighter is suing the...The Queen's English is named the UK's most attractive accent due to its association with 'intelligence and...We're dam well staying! Okay! 'Get a good look at this face, because you won't be seeing it any longer. I said it didn't hurt at all.' Producer B: 'Well, all I know is that watching Chad bludgeon the English language to death over the last six weeks has made me feel a hell of a lot better about myself'Producer A: 'So it's settled! Bloody hero!'
'F**k this noise!

It's the rift tearing apart one of our great cathedrals: On one side, a choir...SEBASTIAN SHAKESPEARE: Fayed family feud continues as the two youngest children of former Harrods owner...The moment firefighters tried to enter Beirut's Warehouse 12 where ammonium nitrate exploded: Missing crew...First, the sonic boom. Mat scoffed.
'Turn's out nice guy's finish last!' In addition, the live show will not have a studio audience. Chad: 'It feels fine actually, never better'Big Brother: 'So you're pushing through the pain? A gradually increasing dollar figure will appear on the screen in front of you. Chad: 'What? 'Chad to the diary room!' 'Chad (through the paper-thin walls): 'Am not!' 'Now it's my turn to go full One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest and prove to all those soft porn directors on Star Now that they were wrong to ignore my profile. Mat! A monster's got me leg! Mat! 'Unless it's a albino chow chow with gold Rolexes on all four paws, I do not give a s**t!' Tricky 15-question quiz reveals if you possess 'superior intelligence'Madeleine McCann suspect Christian Bruekner was illegally extradited to Germany to face a rape trial, EU's...Thousands of coronavirus deaths 'will be wiped off the government's official toll' after urgent review into...Work-from-home Twitter mob rounds on Kirstie Allsopp after she said employees should return to the office to...Wetherspoons is set to cut 130 staff at its head office as Covid jobs bloodbath continues with 135,000...A million people could lose their jobs this year as unemployment hits 7.4 per cent and GDP slumps 9.5% - but...Up to 500,000 Britons are suffering the effects of 'long Covid' - but GPs dismiss their fatigue as being...Ministers 'wasted more than £150million buying face masks that don't work' from investment firm with no...Thug who randomly targeted mother as she pushed her pram though London and stabbed her SEVEN times in the...BBC threatens pensioners with bailiffs if they don't pay the licence fee - after spending £38m on 800 staff...Britain's gone from lockdown to la-la-land! Dan and Mat copped a 'selfish whinging bogan' edit (SWB) on Monday, just days before Australia gets to decide who gets $250,000. 'The diary room door remained shut. Sophie's bannedYou're a hero, Chad! Thanks for the tip on the omelettes though. 'Big Brother: 'You've never seen Bonnie and Clyde, have you? A gradually increasing dollar figure will appear on the screen in front of you. Run along now' PICTURED: Chad's 'injured' ankleBig Brother: 'Silly Chad! And it wouldn't be a trip down memory lane without a completely unnecessary sob story - this time from Sophie.Remember me? Trivia Despite four houseguests exiting before the season's cancellation, Micheal was the only person to be officially evicted on Big Brother Canada 8. 'Daniel: 'Chad. In fairness, Chad, the dog ran head first into the sliding glass door because its vision is awful. First up was nerdy spoon-player Ian, who slapped out an 'Ode to the fame whores' on his pasty thighs to the tune of The Horses by Daryl Braithwaite.Eccentric talent agent Garth returned in his 'Auntie Garth' persona, which was about as laughable as a late era Adam Sandler film.Blast from the past: In the lounge room, our final four were treated to a montage of congratulatory messages from the 16 mostly-boring bogans who came before them'Who the f**k is that?' Not even for Queen and countryBridesmaid for Princess Diana was guest on Epstein island: Clemmie Hambro who took two trips on paedophile's...Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby defends Labour MP who was slammed for joining criticism of the phrase...'Mr Malevolent': Excoriating verdict on Boris Johnson's right hand man Dominic Cummings, by Margaret...Queen of (daytime) mean: TOM LEONARD on why $50m-a-year TV host Ellen DeGeneres is facing savage backlash...STEPHEN GLOVER: High-handed, shameless... so why isn't there outrage about Boris's own Lavender List of...And the 86F heatwave begins!